Some employers begrudge maternity leave benefits, thinking it is just one big vacation–a luxurious, decadent beach holiday, if you will.
Anyone who has lived through the first year as a new parent can tell you that it’s really no day at the beach.
1. Your tour guide yells constantly and you can’t understand him. There is no translator.
2. The open bar is in your bra and it’s expected to serve around the clock.
3. [bctt tweet=”Nobody around here is getting lei’d.”]
4. Incredibly relaxed dress code that is baby vomit optional.
5. An excursion to the grocery store can feel like Club Med when undertaken child-free.
6. Blankets are plentiful, but more ‘baby’ than ‘beach.’
7. Hot tub foam parties only happen with too much bubble bath.
8. The locals are naked a lot, sometimes unexpectedly.
9. Turn down service involves mostly teething biscuits.
10. Everything is based on double occupancy. There’s rarely a minute alone.
Being a new parent is only a vacation in that you are on a break from everything you used to know (like sleep and regular showers). It’s an all inclusive experience. It only takes a few wild nights to realize that you are far too old to party like this. Aloha and welcome to parenting!
This post was originally on Bluntmoms.