I was so inspired by a blog I read on the Healthy Moms website where Julie Perofsky discussed the challenges of choosing your priorities as a mom. I definitely encourage you to read it, because it’s pretty heart wrenching and insightful. It definitely made me re-evaluate why I became a work at home mom and how that relates to how I spend my time.
These are the things I INTENDED to do more of when I started to work from home and how that’s gone:
More Kid Time
I was going to go on field trips. I was going to do school pickups and drop offs. Well, that didn’t go as planned. I don’t know if drop offs are going to happen because I’m so not a morning person (my awesome boyfriend does that.) I am committing to come along for the pickups more often. Now that my son is thoroughly sucked into lacrosse, we are spending more time as a family doing that but I do still want to do some field trips before the school year ends.
I was going to get very fit. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I cannot begin to explain the extent to which this did not happen. Total fail. If I could give anyone starting out as a work at home mom advice I would say to build in a workout routine to your schedule from the beginning. My work at home life started in a very busy cycle work-wise and I did not get going as planned and I’m still working on getting out of the starting gates. This is especially awkward because I support some entrepreneurs in the wellness sphere so I’m feeling not only pretty darn lazy but also highly hypocritical.
I had lots of plans to go visiting more which hasn’t really happened. The thing about having flexibility in your time is that you need to be very intentional to make things happen. Things don’t happen just because there are resources available for them to happen. You need to actually make it happen. It’s easy to get sucked into work. There’s lots of it and it ends in money. Choosing into relationship is something you need to do intentionally; it doesn’t just happen because there’s space for it to happen. This was one of the biggest lessons I’ve had. Just because you can, doesn’t mean you will, and if you want it, you have to follow through. I don’t have anywhere I need to “show up” in a literal sense but I need to show up for my people more as a mom, daughter, grand-daughter, sister and girlfriend. I’m taking a parenting class with Casey O’Roarty of Joyful Courage to try to become a better mom and she inspires me so much every day. As for the rest, it’s on my to do list – in pen.
Operation: Find Joy
I realized I was missing my joy and finding it is still in the works. I’ve made some progress. I know how much I love my downtown Vancouver time and time near the ocean and I’ve made time for that and it’s been magical. I enjoyed some live music and even some live comedy. I have really been loving being a lacrosse mom and have taken in some professional games too. I don’t know if I’ve found my thing yet, but I’m feeling like I’ve found a bit more lightness.
I am so glad I made the decision that I did to work for me full time and it’s been an exciting, crazy, terrifying ride that I’m stoked to continue. I’m going to be making a little more time for my priorities and leaving a little room for joy.